Single in the City

Who goes speed dating? the most common question answered…

 

Guest Author - Melissa - Co-Owner & Event Planner for Single in the City

 

Who goes speed dating? the most common question answered…

After hosting speed dating events for over 8.5 years, there always seems to be one question we get asked when people are considering attending an event for the first time.  This question is not discriminatory, it is asked by both men and women of all ages.

What kind of people go speed dating?

This question is kind of like asking what kind of people go to the grocery store.   There isn’t one kind of person who speed dates, single people come in all shapes, sizes, backgrounds and occupations. As well, no two events are the same when it comes to who will be attending.  I guess you could look at it this way, if you are calling in because you are interested in speed dating, then you could assume that most people who come speed dating are just like you.   

Now we could get more specific such as…what do people wear who come speed dating or do you know the general occupations of those who comes speed dating?   
These are all valid questions we could potentially answer depending on what we ask people when they sign up, but do they determine what “kind” of person they are….probably not. 

It’s difficult for any speed dating host or organizer to know “what kind of person” someone is in the 5 minute time span of registering them either on the phone or at the door,  most events are so busy that the host is lucky to get in a 2 minute conversation with an individual before or after an event. If we were to judge someone’s personality  based on their appearance, then we could probably give you some sort of answer. However, judging someone based on their appearance is not really the best approach to take in any business especially when it comes to dating.

To sum it up, the kind of people who come speed dating are just like you.  They're single, prefer to meet people face to face, have some sort of baggage, are employed (because our tickets cost money), are nervous, optimistic and finally, just like you, they want to know “what kind of people go speed dating”. 

Online Dating Pictures Posting Advice

OK so if you're going to take the time to open an online dating profile on an online dating website, it's in your best interest to post a few good pictures of yourself. Pictures really tell a lot about a person and a great first impression is key. Here's a checklist for you to follow:

- Make sure pictures are recent (within the last 2 years) 

- Make sure your online pictures are of you and not scenery of where you've been; people don't care necessarily care about scenery shots when they're looking for hot guys or hot girls (which is left up to one's personal discretion of course). 

- Post what you would consider to be your best pictures and ask someone for their opinion if it's not too much trouble. 

- Make sure your online pictures are close-ups so they can see what you really look like. 

- Make sure your online pictures are clear and don't wear glasses we can't see your eyes. 

- Don't be half naked in your pics if you're not ready to receive sexual comments or have people approach you for sex. 

- Don't post online pictures of you and your ex or someone of the opposite sex (find someone that can edit your pics for you). 

- Don't post a picture of a good looking celebrity because that's pointless and the people you want to contact you, won't. 

- Make sure that your pictures are current. People want to see what you look like currently and not in the past. If you end up meeting up with someone and look totally different than your picture, you might be wasting your time as that person will not be too impressed with you. 

Next time you post your online dating pictures, follow these tips as they can determine the difference between a positive and negative online experience.

Laura Bilotta is the co-founder of  Single in the City. with a background in television, sales, radio, media and promotions. Her many years of experience working in the dating industry as a professional matchmaker, allows her to share her expertise and give dating and relationship advice.

 

What if my date just wants to be friends?

There could be many reasons why someone is not interested in dating you further or continuing a relationship with you.  Whatever the reason, you have to be honest with yourself. Are you ok with just being friends with them or are you hoping that by being their friend they will change their mind about you?  Remember, there is someone out there for everybody. If you know you want more from him than just to be friends, don't set yourself up for disappointment; just move on, trust me. Don't waste time hanging around someone that in not into you, life is too short and there are many more fish in the sea.  The more time you waste hoping that someone falls in love with you, the further away you are from finding your true love.

Posted by Laura Bilotta of www.singleinthecity.ca and "Streeters" Host of Dating 201 on Rogers.

Is it ok to text, email or call a guy after a first date?

In my opinion, it's ok to text, email or call a guy after a first date to say thank you especially if he paid for the date.  keep it brief and let him know you had a good time.  Guys like to feel appreciated; just don't be pushy and wait for him to call you the next time.

Posted by Laura Bilotta of www.singleinthecity.ca and Streeters Host of Dating 201 on Rogers.

Are there more gentlemen these days or selfish, clueless and hopeless romantics?

It's a Saturday night and I was invited by my friend Violet to the hockey game at the ACC.  We had platinum seats given to us by her ex husband who’s a scalper here in Toronto.  Once we got to the game, she introduced me to another scalper friend Gino.   He told me I was beautiful as he eyed me up and down uncomfortably like I was naked or something. He then turned around and traded our gold seats for Platinum seats a friendly, gentleman like gesture. Would he have traded the seats if he knew he could sell them?  Probably not but he could have also given them to someone else. During the 1^st period break on our way to the Platinum Lounge for a drink we walked by the Philadelphia locker room when out came a Philadelphia player.  It was a moment of pure pleasure and excitement for me but it didn’t help that I forgot to think before I spoke.  I blurted out  “ What can I get you, anything ?” And he replies, “A blow job”. Whaaaaat? I’m thinking, now that was pure class but I guess I walked into that one.     As I'm waiting for Violet outside of the bathroom, I notice a cute guy looking at me so I play along with him to see where it takes me. I give him the hand signal to wait a minute.  When I came back from the bathroom, 2^nd period had started and he was gone.  I came back down for  the next break and there he was so I went up to say hi.  I gave him my number and he text me later that night saying that the ball was in my court if we wanted to meet up again.  In my court?  Why would the ball be in my court where the heck are your balls? This led me to believe that he may have some insecurity issues and that’s a big no no especially  for someone who owns a dating company (www.singleinthecity.ca) After the game was over Violet and I were walking out deciding where to go when this really cute guy named Chris approached me and said “I think love you”.  I said, “you love me”? What do you love about me? He says “I don’t know but come meet up with me for a drink”.  We decided to meet up with Chris and his friend at the Loose Moose.  Call me crazy but I call it spontaneity.   The UFC was on and the bar was busy. Chris say’s “Let’s go get a drink”, but he didn't  move from where he was standing.  I had to approach the bar and ask him if he wanted a drink and he says to me, “you order yours and I’ll get mine afterwards”.  Whaaaaaat? Is this guy for real? He approaches me, invites me for a drink and then makes me buy my own. How does he not know that he looks like a complete and unclassy fool? Any smart girl with dignity would run for the hills.  I wanted to give him some professional advice but I just couldn’t be bothered.    We later went by another bar where we met up with  some guys we knew. They kept offering us drinks which was very kind but not mandatory of course. One of them named Jim was pointing at some woman who he had sex with a little while ago and was explaining how  she saw him at a bar and lost it on him for being a man whore. LOL……he is a man whore loves to play around to see how many women he can get to lust after him and he’s 43, that’s the sad part.  If we can expect this from men at 43, what do you think the poor 25 year old girls are getting these days.    

Post by Laura Bilotta of Single in the City  www.singleinthecity.ca and Streeters Host of Dating 201 on Rogers.